Critique Request First scroll design, I would really appreciate your advice/critique/opinions

[vanLanen]

Hello everyone,

I want to show my first scroll design, I’ve been practicing and studying scrolls in my free time the past couple weeks.
its still really challenging tho, this one is really simple but for my first I’m pretty pleased with the results.

please let me know what you think.
- Thomas van Lanen

 

[dcurrie911]

Hi Thomas. My first thought was it is much better than my early attempts. Keep up the good work. My second thought was ‘thorny’. I don’t like all the small outside leaf features. I also don’t like the origin. Just my opinions though.

How about starting again with something like this?

 

[vanLanen]

Hi Thomas. My first thought was it is much better than my early attempts. Keep up the good work. My second thought was ‘thorny’. I don’t like all the small outside leaf features. I also don’t like the origin. Just my opinions though.

How about starting again with something like this?

Thank you for taking the time to reply, and for making the drawing.
yes the origin is a point where I struggle a lot to come up with a matching design.
now you’ve said Thorny, all I see now is thorns, when I look at the design.
ill be practicing more leaf shapes! Thanks again

 

[ByrnBucks]

Hello there Thomas, I like your first scrolls. I’m just starting myself and your drawing skills far surpass my own, that being said here are a couple of easy leaves that I’m sure you can incorporate into your future designs. Dustin Byrn

 

[monk]

the leaf structure is too wide. such destroys the element of flow to youur design i would have also started where you did, but with a scroll, not leaves. i'd advise designing with basic scroll and not getting into much detaailing. it all takes time.

 

[vanLanen]

Hello there Thomas, I like your first scrolls. I’m just starting myself and your drawing skills far surpass my own, that being said here are a couple of easy leaves that I’m sure you can incorporate into your future designs. Dustin Byrn View attachment 47381

Thanks for your reply and drawing Dustin.
i did indeed think about a few different leaf structures, but im afraid it’s gonna look to cluttered, I tried to keep it a bit in the same style, but see now it’s not really working out.
thanks,
-Thomas

 

[vanLanen]

the leaf structure is too wide. such destroys the element of flow to youur design i would have also started where you did, but with a scroll, not leaves. i'd advise designing with basic scroll and not getting into much detaailing. it all takes time.

Thank you for the advise Monk, I’ll work on it.